I Am Not Them

I have been in a paralyzed state of no function lately.  I received some news that made my soul feel a bit “kicked to the curb” and I haven’t wanted to expose myself to it any further than required…which really is not far.  So here is the deal…Last year I went to this AWESOME conference called Emerging Women.  I met and experienced so much positive energy during this time and for a time afterward that I was elated to begin my work as a blogger, truth teller, public speaker, and whatever it is that I end up creating out of “My Souls Circus” that I might have jumped in with both feet before even checking the water temperature.  I knew that I wanted to be on the stage at a future Emerging Women conference so not only did I mention that to my power circle at the 2016 event, I pounced on the opportunity extended by Emerging Women to apply to be a speaker on a sister stage at Emerging Women 2017.  The day I opened that email it was like my insides exploded with excitement and all the stars that would have been singing if it were night were perfectly aligned into the words – “Dare Greatly Cherisse” (see picture below of the bracelet I wear every day).

I grabbed my shapie colored markers/pens and my pretty pink paper and just let the idea for a speech flow from my mind through my fingers, spelling errors and all, onto the sheet.  It is not pretty but it is pretty awesome!  REFRAME TO RESILIENCE

I hesitated only slightly before typing up the email, answering all the required questions and attaching that photo just to show my unabashed, over the moon giddiness, about the possibility of speaking at this conference, about resilience, and being a real live truth teller like some of my best friends (these women have no idea that I am their best friend so please, lets not bother them with the details) Brene Brown, Glennon Doyle Melton, Anne Lamont, Tara Mohr, Elle Luna, just to name a few.  I guess I am very popular in my head!!

Well, my truth telling starts here kids…..I am not one of my best friends!  I do not have a best selling book, I do not own or run a successful business, I do not have a degree in anything other than plain old nerdy mathematics!  The only big speeches I have given (so far….notice how I am NOT giving up) are funerals (Granny Mae and Aunt Josie) and a few fundraising events for our local United Way.  Those were big deals to me so I am still counting them on my public speaking resume even if no one else gives a damn.  So, I am not yet the material for a big time conference and thus my rejection letter hit a bit hard.  Hard enough that I left a trail of nasty used tissue from the bedroom to the sunroom where I attempted to hide my broken from my sleeping family.  Guess I should have trashed the evidence because Husband was all confused in the morning.

So there it is…my first big time rejection.  But guess what….I AM resilient and I am going to “Reframe to Resilience” just like my speech title said!!

I am going to Emerging Women 2018 next month in Denver and I am going to light up like a golden glow stick as I meet and mingle with these awesome women and I learn from them all the bits and pieces that I need to let my sparkle fly even further.

In the wise words of my friend A.B., maybe I just need a little glitter!

Sparkle on…


2 thoughts on “I Am Not Them”

  1. You are an amazing inspiration! Rejection and failure make us that much tougher and more determined. I have reached some lofty goals this past year and am certain, that you have it inside you to do the same. Glitter is only a pretty on the outside. You, my treasured friend, have that sparkle and shine deep in your soul.

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